If you're a mama in the middle of a hard chapter, trying to conceive, processing a loss, or quietly wondering if your body will ever cooperate—Lia Ramos wants you to know one thing: you are not alone, and you are stronger than you think.
Today, Mama Lia is a mama of two—Kiara, 6, and Layla, 5—a longtime beauty and skincare professional, and most recently, a Hyrox enthusiast training alongside her husband. From the outside, her life looks like a full, beautiful picture of motherhood. But the road there was anything but easy.
A "yes" from the very first date
Lia met her husband when she was 30. On their first date, he asked her if she wanted to have kids. She said yes without hesitation. "We both knew we wanted to be parents," she recalls. But her early 30s were all about the hustle—building a career, starting a business—and it wasn't until age 35 that she and her husband got married.
Like many of us, Lia assumed pregnancy would come easily. "For some reason, I never thought that it would be a challenge to some women, and in particular, that it would be a challenge for me," she shares.
Two months after the wedding, she found out she was pregnant. A month later, she lost the baby.
The second loss, and a heavier silence
Determined to be proactive, Lia and her husband began testing. They tried IUI. It didn't take. They kept hoping. A year later, Lia got pregnant naturally—this time at 37. At their first ultrasound between six and eight weeks, they heard a heartbeat. "I knew there was a living being inside me, growing. I knew this time would be different."
But at 10 weeks, while packing boxes during an office move, Lia noticed spotting. Her heart sank. The emergency ultrasound confirmed her worst fear: no heartbeat.
Calling her husband to tell him is the moment she remembers breaking. "The first thing that comes to mind is, 'What a disappointment.' I was giving him something that would disappoint him." It's a feeling so many mamas carry quietly—that somehow, the loss is theirs to be ashamed of.
Her husband's response is one she still holds onto: We can go through this together. It's going to be fine. "When he said that, I knew we'd be able to overcome whatever challenge would come our way."
Two days after her D&C, Lia went back to work. Not out of denial—but out of a refusal to feel sorry for herself. "I knew I needed to bounce back. I needed to be surrounded by people who care for me."
Finding the answer: APAS
At 37, Lia's OB referred her to an IVF specialist and an immunologist. After more rounds of testing and treatments—some of them physically painful—she finally had her answer: APAS (Antiphospholipid Antibody Syndrome), an autoimmune disorder that causes the body to reject pregnancy.
"I couldn't keep the baby. That's why I was miscarrying twice in a row." The diagnosis was devastating, but it was also a turning point. Now there was something to treat. Something to fight.
"It wasn't easy. There was physical pain. But you don't want to lose hope, because a lot of women have gone through even more challenging situations."
The pregnancies that finally stayed
A year later, Lia and her husband returned to the IVF doctor. One round. The next month—successful.
Because of APAS, she had to inject heparin every single day, from day one of her pregnancy until two weeks before delivery. There was spotting in the first trimester, bed rest, cancelled trips. "A small price to pay to ensure the pregnancy would be safe."In 2019, Kiara was born. Then, during the darkness of the pandemic, Lia got pregnant naturally—and Layla arrived as her unexpected blessing.
What Mama Lia wants every mama to hear
"It surprised me how strong a woman is through an experience like that," Lia reflects. "You just become stronger when you go through all those heartbreaks—things you cannot control—but you just need to keep on hoping."
To the mama reading this in the middle of her own hard chapter, Lia's message is gentle and clear: You are not alone. "We think we carry all this burden on our own as we strive for motherhood. But there are so many women going through the same thing, and so many people who love you. Get some strength from them too."
And if she could speak to her past self—the one crying behind a bathroom door, the one bracing for another ultrasound, the one wondering if she'd ever be a mama—she would tell her this:Every heartbreak, every bit of pain, every sacrifice—it will all be worth it once you become a mother. It will change you in so many ways. And you wouldn't trade it for anything.
You got this, mama.
